finding your religous type

Pinny

Pinny" is a really silly word, short for pinafore.


It’s a sleeveless garment worn as an apron. Pinafores may be worn by girls as a decorative garment and by both girls and women as a protective apron

My mother wore one as did most women of
her generation

She had the complete set, slippers as well !

Nowadays long aprons are worn in posh bistro restaurants and look superb :~))
For a complete history of the pinny

Link to pattern to make your own

and patterns for vintage pinny's

Statistics

Statistics means never having to say youre certain.......
I should know, I live with one !

* Ten percent of all car thieves are left-handed

* All polar bears are left-handed

* If your car is stolen, there's a 10 percent chance it was nicked by a Polar bear

* 39 percent of unemployed men wear spectacles

* 80 percent of employed men wear spectacles

* Work stuffs up your eyesight

* All dogs are animals

* All cats are animals

* Therefore, all dogs are cats

* A total of 4000 cans are opened around the world every second

* Ten babies are conceived around the world every second

* Each time you open a can, you stand a 1 in 400 chance of falling

FACT Pornograhpy is the most searched for item on the web

Funny statistics

puns (for educated minds!)

 The pun, or paronomasia, is a form of word play which suggests two or more meanings, by exploiting multiple meanings of words, or of similar-sounding words, for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect.

The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference

He acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island,

but it turned out to be an optical  Aleutian. 

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class,

because it was a weapon of math disruption. 

A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. 

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.

The police are Looking into it.

Time flies like an arrow.

Fruit flies like a banana. 

Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.

One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' 

I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.

Then it hit me. 

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:

'Keep off the Grass.' 

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison

was a Small Medium at Large

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray

is now a seasoned veteran. 

A backward poet writes inverse. 

In a democracy it's your vote that counts.

In feudalism it's your Count that votes. 

When cannibals ate a missionary,

they got a taste of religion. 

     Lots more HERE

Mid Life Crisis

Translation....

Man: 5 years ago darling, we had a tiny apartment, a 2nd hand car and we slept on a mattress on the floor. But I slept with a sexy young woman.... ....
Now we have a luxurious villa, a BMW, a big plasma TV and we sleep in a huge water bed, but you are nearly 50......


Woman: Darling, the only thing you need to do is to look for a sexy young blond. Then I can quickly make sure that you live in a tiny apartment, drive around in a 2nd hand car and sleep on the floor again.....




Listen to David Burns singing about the phenomina of a mid life crisis

Flirting

Origin:

Mid 16th century: apparently symbolic, the elements fl- and -irt both suggesting sudden movement; compare with  flick and  spurt. The original verb senses were ‘give someone a sharp blow’ and ‘sneer at’; the earliest noun senses were ‘joke, jibe’ and ‘flighty girl’

Whereas Wikipedia has : Flirting is non-physical sexual communication between two people to negotiate mutual attraction through body language and verbal tactics.

 

<< It can be romantic

or totally practical >>

How to flirt  at 40 - 50 - online  and when all else fails......

Society for the Rescue of Hijacked Words

Perhaps we should start a Society for the Rescue of Hijacked Words?

There could offer free lifetime memberships to  the following :

Society meetings would certainly be interesting events — some tarts would doubtless try to work the convention hotels and then the pigs would bust the event and we would all end up before the beak and end up receiving porridge.

email me with your suggestions......